Belonging, Difference, and Resistance

Being defined as a “true American” in contemporary America is restricted to those who resemble a White, cisgender, heterosexual, Christian, middle-class, Republican, male with United States birthright citizenship (Violante et al., 2020; Lorde, 1980). This mythical norm controls claims to belonging and experiences of exclusion, marginalization, being otherized, or being made invisible. Lorde (1980) presents the struggle to accept difference, even within progressive movements. She shares the example of white women who classify ‘woman’ based on their own experiences and knowledge, excluding those of Black women. Additionally, some Black women ignore or deny the experiences of Black lesbians despite shared gender and racial identities. Exclusion within the same identity categories highlights the common tendency to respond negatively to individuals and identities that do not conform to the mythical norm, or even to our own. Lorde (1980) extends this thought by explaining that a negative response to difference is conditioned by the absence of a positive response to it. As a result, we distance ourselves from experiences, knowledge, and points of view that contrast with our own. With fewer connections to others with identities other than our own, we limit the chances of understanding and connection across differences. Rather, creating connections of difference can be viewed as an act of resistance, forming bonds that value difference rather than marginalizing it. This paper is split into three sections. First, reinforcement of the mythical norm in the social contract and contemporary society (Pateman & Mills, 2007). Second, critiquing the current system that privileges those who adhere to the mythical norm. This section disrupts the normalization of domination and violence (Ferguson, 2018) and highlights the need to oppose one-dimensionality as an act of resistance (Ferguson, 2018; Lorde, 1980; Spira, 2025). Finally, a necessity for a new system to deconstruct the opposing connection between belonging and difference. Queer of color critique values resisting single-issue politics and emphasizes multidimensional and intersectional approaches. Abolition for change is included to represent the critical need for resistance spaces that hold difference, to replace ‘belonging’ with other terms (such as solidarity), and the power of both/and as an act of resistance to one-dimensionality in social transformation. In this paper, I extend the idea that difference and belonging should not be viewed as mutually exclusive. Similarly, how belonging should not be conferred by adherence to the mythical norm. Resistance is integral for reimagining conceptions and acts of belonging.